Not only did I work 10.5 hours and got $10/hour for it, but I got paid that same rate for 2 extra hours for “driving time” because it took me 45min each way to get there. AND if 12.5 hours of pay wasn’t good enough, the company is also reimbursing me for gas at $0.49 per mile which means roughly $55 extra. It costs me $55 to fill my tank and I only used a little less than a quarter tank to get there. Pretty good money made today if you ask me…
There was a fundamentalist christian protester on the UT Austin campus today.
Adam: Montez, how you doing?
Montez: How does it look like I’m doing? I’m on top of the goddamn world. I got up at 5:30 in the A.M. this morning, 5:30 in the goddamn A.M. Y’all wanna know why?
Blake: Because you had sex with your wife?
Montez: Laid out the tarp, got out that good-ass baby oil, and I was in it. Just BAM! I got in my power stance and I was like ca-ca-cacacacaca-ca! Cause there’s only one rule in my bedroom…FUCK. ALL. RULES. It was like the wild, wild west up in there. It’s like Afghanistan! Iraq! Motherfuckin’ Lord of the Rings in there! Y’all don’t know ‘bout my bedroom!
Fuckin annoying lol.
“I wish we never fucked, and I mean that. But not really. You say the nastiest shit in bed and it’s fuckin’ awesome.”
“And don’t bring up girlfriends. Yeah, I don’t have one cause after I broke up with mine of 5 years, I learned something: My right hand is the best girlfriend. She cooks, cleans, and pleasures me sexually. Only she doesn’t talk back, get insecure, or complain when I put my dick in someone else.”
Holy. Fucking. Shit. I laughed so hard, I nearly pissed my pants. Lol.
